News from the Subversive Sports Desk
Here in the Republic of Cascadia we like our sports a little on the subversive side, and as far as athletic competition goes, it doesn’t get much more deliciously subversive than Women’s Flat Track Roller Derby. Forget the Portland Trailblazers landing the #1 pick in the NBA draft, or the Seattle Mariners enjoying their best season in years, Portland and all of Cascadia is going crazy for our hometown girls the Rose City Rollers. Last Saturday the Rollers elite All-star squad, dubbed “The Wheels of Justice” took on the gritty girls from the mile high city, Denver’s “5280 Fight Club.” The last time these teams met it was an all out brawl on wheels, with the “Fight Club” edging the “Wheels” by a mere five points. But this time Portland was playing for more than just revenge and bragging rights. The Wheels are ranked 13th nationally in the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA) and they were looking to put the big hurt on Denver (ranked 17th) in order to move up in the rankings. From the opening whistle it was clear whose night this was. Portland drummed up a ton of business for their team’s primary sponsor, the Portland Orthopedic and Fracture Clinic, by literally steamrolling the girls from Denver. The Wheels were running up the points faster than the team of referees could count. Portland was led by their all-star Jammers: Rhea DeRange, Sol Train and Goodie Two Skates, who were seemingly scoring points at will. The Jammers were backed up by a whole cast of hard hitting muscle, including November Pain, Mega Hurtz and Dora Doom. No team in a WFTDA Bout has broken 100 points this season but by the end of the first period the Wheels had ru
n the score up so high that the chants of One-Hun-Dred were echoing through the rink from the rabid crowd. Although they slowed the pace down to take it easy on their opponent in the final two periods, the Wheels easily broke 100 points and the 111 to 74 final score seems a lot closer than this blowout bout really was. This overwhelming performance will surely catapult Portland into the top 10 WFTDA rankings and it also serves notice to any other teams who dare come to Portland to face the wrath of the Wheels of Justice. No one gets off easy in the Rollers House of Pain!!
Here in the Republic of Cascadia we like our sports a little on the subversive side, and as far as athletic competition goes, it doesn’t get much more deliciously subversive than Women’s Flat Track Roller Derby. Forget the Portland Trailblazers landing the #1 pick in the NBA draft, or the Seattle Mariners enjoying their best season in years, Portland and all of Cascadia is going crazy for our hometown girls the Rose City Rollers. Last Saturday the Rollers elite All-star squad, dubbed “The Wheels of Justice” took on the gritty girls from the mile high city, Denver’s “5280 Fight Club.” The last time these teams met it was an all out brawl on wheels, with the “Fight Club” edging the “Wheels” by a mere five points. But this time Portland was playing for more than just revenge and bragging rights. The Wheels are ranked 13th nationally in the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA) and they were looking to put the big hurt on Denver (ranked 17th) in order to move up in the rankings. From the opening whistle it was clear whose night this was. Portland drummed up a ton of business for their team’s primary sponsor, the Portland Orthopedic and Fracture Clinic, by literally steamrolling the girls from Denver. The Wheels were running up the points faster than the team of referees could count. Portland was led by their all-star Jammers: Rhea DeRange, Sol Train and Goodie Two Skates, who were seemingly scoring points at will. The Jammers were backed up by a whole cast of hard hitting muscle, including November Pain, Mega Hurtz and Dora Doom. No team in a WFTDA Bout has broken 100 points this season but by the end of the first period the Wheels had ru
n the score up so high that the chants of One-Hun-Dred were echoing through the rink from the rabid crowd. Although they slowed the pace down to take it easy on their opponent in the final two periods, the Wheels easily broke 100 points and the 111 to 74 final score seems a lot closer than this blowout bout really was. This overwhelming performance will surely catapult Portland into the top 10 WFTDA rankings and it also serves notice to any other teams who dare come to Portland to face the wrath of the Wheels of Justice. No one gets off easy in the Rollers House of Pain!! For those of you in the New York City area, don’t forget to check out the Gotham Girls Roller Derby League. Next up on the schedule, the Manhattan Mayhem take on the Queens of Pain, August 11 at City College of NY. For more info on the Fabulous Rose City Rollers and their All-Star Squad, the Wheels of Justice, check out their excellent website at rosecityrollers.com
--submitted by cousin marc, the wandering road
1 comment:
"No team in a WFTDA Bout has broken 100 points this season."
That's actually not true, not even close. There were multiple 100+ games during just the western regional tournament this season I believe.
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